Regarding DogJoy
(Preface: It has taken me several days to write this because I’m having trouble focusing. Some of the statements may already be outdated by the time you read this. Things are moving way too fast!)
The political crisis we are facing has me nearly frozen in my tracks. Every morning I wake up, catch up on current events and think to myself “what the f^ck?” (I don’t use the F word generally, but it fits right now.) I want, with my whole being, to hide under the covers, where it’s warm, safe and quiet. I do not want to face the day. I do not want to find a way to fight. I’m tired. We all are tired. But you know what gets me out of bed in the morning?
She does.
This ragamuffin dog needs to be walked every morning and I will not let her down. I have to get up, get dressed (because I refuse to be seen outside in my pajamas) and get out.
Mozi, who is 11, loves her morning walks. She sniffs and lollygags and meanders, as one should in the morning. Putting her needs before my own means I have to get out of bed, face the day and take care of my responsiblities. The bonus is the dopamine hit I get when I look at her face. After our walk, I always feel better and can eat breakfast, comb my hair, brush my teeth and get ready for whatever work I have to do that day.
Usually, my week days are spent walking other people’s dogs. When they are with me, though, they are my dogs and I fully immerse myself in their world. These dogs rely on me to get them out, to do their business and explore their world. Whatever scents they smelled yesterday may be different today and they have to know. I take the responsiblity of caring for them seriously and, if I have nothing else, I have integrity when caring for other people’s dogs. I will not let them down. To be in their presence is a reminder that life is bigger than humans.
Dogs are my life, and always have been. I’ve built my entire professional career around dogs. If it weren’t for dogs, I’m not sure what I’d be doing. I know I wouldn’t be happy.
If you are reading this, dear reader, you must have an affinity for dogs too. You understand the magic that is a dog. Can you imagine life if their ancestors hadn’t decided to befriend us? That would have been such a tragedy.
Since human behavior tends to baffle me, and I understand the world through the lens of dogs, I’ve been giving a lot of thought to our present prediciment and how to cope with the utter chaos that is happening.
In the canid world, two alphas can not exist together. There can be an alpha and a beta, however. The alpha, being the true leader…the one with the power… will tolerate the beta…for a while. Eventually, the alpha and the beta will come to a power struggle and one of them will win, running out the other to become a loner or form their own new pack. I believe this is what is happening right now between the two men who think they can run a country. This is just my opinion and the only thing I have to back this up is my extensive knowledge of dog behavior.
A pack mentality is beginning to form and I am already seeing the signs of this as I’m out walking dogs. I won’t delve any deeper into this because it’s distressing, but if you look closely, I bet you’ll notice it too.
Even if the alpha male claims victory, it’s the alpha female who is actually in charge. Think about that.
How am I coping? I’ve made a decision to find DogJoy in my every day life. My resistance to this craziness is to continue to live in DogJoy. The dogs have no idea what is happening but they know I’m stressed. When my Garmin Watch goes off because my resting heart rate is too high, the dogs know. They remind me to breathe. They remind me to be in the moment. They remind me that there is love in the world. Those things can not be taken away from me.
The choice to find DogJoy is my way of resisting what “they” are trying to suppress. Because of my love of dogs, I have a daily source of inspiration and gumption. (Don’t you just love that word? Gumption!) The dogs feed my soul and my spirit, and, while I may not be the kind of person to phsycially involve myself in a protest march, they give me what I need to resist the desire to stay under the covers all day.
When I’m not walking dogs, I am photographing dogs or writing about dogs. They are as essential to me as air is to breathe.
Yesterday, my husband and I went to a local park to do some location scouting for a photo shoot, and we came across and older gentleman with an old, black bi-eyed shepherd mix. The dog was off leash and his dad and he were having a stand off of sorts. The dad was standing by the car with the door open waiting for the dog to get in the car, while the dog stood about 15 feet from the car and stared at his dad. We stopped about 10 feet away because I wanted to see who would win this stand off. It didn’t take long for the dog to realize we were there, so as soon as he turned his head, I was on my knees with my arms out (because that’s what I do, you know). The dog looked me in the eye, walked right over to me and let me sink my fingers into his thick fur as he leaned into me. His dad literally gasped and said “You must have the touch. He doesn’t let just anyone pet him.” I laughed. “Yes, I do” I said.
Moments like that make me feel validated and leave me with a sense of peace. If a dog chooses to engage with me, I must be doing something right. THAT can not be bought, manipulated, lied about or taken away from me.
If I have dogs in my life, I’m going to be ok. DogJoy.
Dear reader, I sincerely wish for you to have something in your life like DogJoy. If you do, immerse yourself in it. It will boost your will to resist. “They” can’t have it nor can “they” take it away from you. It’s yours.
I don’t know what the future holds for us. I know things look very bleak right now and I am feeling the same hopelessness I felt after 9/11. We are experiencing another large scale trauma. (I’m not sure we’ve recovered from 9/11, Hurricane Katrine, Superstorm Sandy and Covid!) We have endured so much trauma as a nation but I don’t think people even realize that’s what it is….trauma.
The answer to dealing with trauma is resiliency. To build resiliency, you have to take care of yourself. Rest, eat, drink water and find some joy. If/when the time comes to fight, we will be ready if you take the time for self care. DogJoy is my self care. What’s yours?
Hugs to your dog!
Holly (and Mozi)